A Responsibility to Love: Lesson from Honduras. Application to Everywhere.
Discovering the
Opportunity
After returning from a trip to Guatemala taken over the
Christmas/New Year’s break, a friend at work, Micki, told me about an annual humanitarian
trip to Honduras taken by a group calling themselves “the Wilderness team”. The team was a group of friends and friends
of friends who can all trace their associations back to one man: Bob Hope.
Prior to the Honduran adventure I did not know Bob, nor did
I know anyone else who would participate.
I worked with Bob’s daughter, Claire, in AutoTrader Group’s marketing
department. Being a big fan of Claire’s
and trusting Micki’s recommendations, I signed on to be part of the 2013
Wilderness group—one of my best choices this year to date.
My interactions with Bob were limited to email exchanges,
and while email couldn’t give me a full picture of Bob’s vast personality, I
could tell I would like him immediately from his initial emails (including the
one where Bob reminded us we were about to embark on a journey to a third world
country ranked as the most dangerous
based on murders per 100,000 people and simultaneously reminded us to don sunscreen and to remember to bring candy as “one week of sugar won’t rot the kids’ teeth”). In person my presumptions were confirmed when
upon meeting Bob face-to-face in Honduras he exclaimed with a larger than life
grin:
“We have successfully coordinated the most un-organized arrival ever!”
Bob
reminded me of my dear mentor, Dean of CSU’s School of business, Dr. Michael
Deis. When anything went wrong, Dr. Deis
would roll with it equipped with a smile.
I saw that in Bob and felt right at home. With guards always present wherever our group went, I not only felt at home, I felt safe.
Making Friends
Adventures of any sort require a certain amount of
similarities as it relates to personalities and values. While the attendee professions included an
array of specialties from medical to contracting, IT to real estate, education
to news reporting and singing to football coaching, we all had a common thread:
love for humanity and a desire to share that love.
One group member in particular named Darryl, a stand-up
comedian residing in NYC, made the following statement when asked why he came
to serve in Honduras:
“I’m a citizen of Earth and have a responsibility.”
I feel confident to say that every member
in the group felt that way by the end of the trip.
Our group had the pleasure of sharing the facilities at HOI
(Honduras Outreach International), the organization which hosts groups from the
US in the Agalta Valley, with a team of veterinarians and veterinary students
from MO, OH, and TX. We bonded with the
vet team and even shared a talent night on our final evening at the ranch.
Beyond the US friends, we made many friends in the local
Hondurans. Ranch staff members including the cattle gauchos who taught me and
Tamara how to milk a cow, Marta who led our group and called everyone her “babies”,
the armed guards who made us feel secure (double secure when we were already
locked in the schools), the teachers at the elementary and secondary schools,
and the cooks who provided us with three meals a day and made the best accommodations
for our eating preferences as possible (example Byron one day requested a plate
of sliced tomatoes and a bowl of pico de gallo on another day as he “loved”
tomatoes).
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| Semi-amateur-pro cow-milker |
Opening My Eyes
& Opening Theirs
My mother took great care of me growing up. She did many things for me that seemed
mandatory at the time: cleaned my dirty dishes, laundered and ironed my
clothes, cleaned my bathroom, made breakfast for me (including waking up an
hour early to make banana crepes when I requested them), stayed up late helping
me with school projects I put off until the last week, and completed so many
more thankless jobs. I assumed parents should do those things. When my mom
taught me how to clean my own clothes, how to cook my own crepes, the
importance of cleanliness and striving to increase my knowledge of the world
and to pursue my dreams, I thought she was doing what every mom SHOULD do.
When I started volunteering in soup kitchens and at the
homeless shelter when I was 12, my eyes began to be opened to a world where not
all moms could give their children the safety and the opportunities mine gave
me. When I first traveled out of country
at age 15 I saw mothers who loved their children tremendously yet didn’t encourage them to develop dreams of leaving their small communities. They didn't have the means to educate them, so why let them dream?
When I studied in Chile while in college, I
saw drunken men and women who beat their children for not selling enough
tattered paper calendars or old candy to tourists and not brining in enough
money to afford more alcohol. My eyes were
then completely opened. My friends and I
cried as we sat in a small bakery in Valparaiso where we shared a piece of cake with a 4 year old girl and her 2 year old brother who we out on the streets
selling garbage as their parent’s little slaves. The boy had cuts on his face and gashes in
his mouth from where his father had broken a beer bottle on his face when he
came back home without money. I KNEW we
had so many more options in the US than were available elsewhere in the
world.
I KNEW I wanted to make an impact on the lives of people in places where their parents combined were not able to provide even a fraction of what my mother gave to me.
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| Chile in 2005 |
Honduras, like most of the countries I have visited, suffers
from a lack of knowledge and a lack of love. Perhaps it even lacks the
knowledge of the responsibility to
love.
One of our group members happens to be the Honduran Consul General
to the US. Emelisa is her name, and she
is on a mission to incite a movement amongst the Honduran people: a movement to
volunteer.
Emelisa repeatedly referred to North American people as
being a “giving people”. She says it is
in our culture and in our blood to volunteer and to care about our poor. Not only does the US government have a system
intended to care for the needy (despite any personal views of the systems
efficiency), the US provides tax breaks to non-profit and civic organizations
who serve the communities. Beyond the government,
there are millions of people who give of themselves to others outside their
familial ties.
In Honduras, there are not the same efforts placed to
encourage citizens to share of their efforts or of their time. In small villages and towns, most have too
little resources to share and find that basic tasks such as preparing a meal
require more time that cannot be spared to assist another. In the cities, there are some who feel an
heir of entitlement. They made it into
the city life and are privileged. Why
should they give of their time to go into a small village hours from the big
city to help the unfortunate?
Multiple times during the trip I received the question “Why would you volunteer here?” Villagers are expressively grateful and always
seem to be amazed that we would help people who we don’t even know. Families in the villages are more apt to
share the little they have and to care for each other with time that they
have. One wealthy family thanked us for our efforts by inviting us into their home and providing us with the best spread of fruits during the trip!
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| I can't get this picture to rotate!!! |
In contrast, I learned of the insensitivity in the cities
and the negativity that comes in their homes.
I learned that ‘cutting’ has become a new problem in the area, that in
the city in 2012 there were 606 reported cases of women between the ages of
20-24 who were kidnapped and murdered in Tegucigalpa. Violence in the big cities is ever on the rise. The presence of the MS 13 (El Salvador’s most
violent gang which has spread internationally and is even one of the most
violent and deadly gangs in the US) is alarming. The presence of these gang members and their
involvement with drug and firearm trafficking and kidnapping is so widespread
that in the cities it is assumed gang members are anywhere you look. Troubled city kids can join the gangs as
young as 10 years of age!
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| News: Five murdered in massacre. On another page: 606 women kidnapped and murdered. |
There are more humble in the poor and rural and more proud
in the rich and urban. One Honduran
millionaire I met in the city told me that volunteering was “below him”. He gives his money to elderly facilities in Tegucigalpa
and donates money to cancer studies but “[doesn’t]
have time to pour concrete for poor people who can’t work for themselves”. I commended him for his donations to the old
and to the ill and encouraged him to try to remember how he came to attain his
stature. I encouraged him to teach
others to also be entrepreneurs and to work with troubled kids in the city to
guide them away from gang memberships.
He offered to teach and to guide me.
Not quite what I was going for…
Emelisa is working the Rotary associations in Honduras with the wealthy
leaders and business owners in efforts so they might open their eyes to the
reality surrounding them. She is
pleading with them to work together to create a safer, more knowledgeable
community. With knowledge comes power. If the youth can become empowered now, they
are far more likely to steer away from lifelong self-sentences such as joining
the deadly gangs and cartels.
Have we opened our eyes to see that THEIR drug and gang
problems are becoming OUR drug and gang problems? In the late 1980’s the gang spread so far
north it entered the US borders. Now
there are cliques in Washington DC, Oregon, Alaska, Arkansas, Texas, Nevada,
Utah, Oklahoma, Illinois, Michigan, New York, Maryland, Virginia, Georgia, and Florida. DC cops estimate between 5-6,000 members in
the DC area alone. The gang that is run
from El Salvador and Honduras is now spreading fast in US soil.
Home, Home on the
Ranch
HOI’s ranch has been around for 20 years now. It is in Olancho, about 8 hours away from
Tegucigalpa. The area is lovely and has
a sweet rural feel to it. When on the
ranch there is no feeling of insecurity; rather, it has a feeling like being at
summer camp with your friends. When not
involved with service work or eating, most visiting residents spend their time
reading in rocking chairs or taking a siesta in one of the many hammocks hung
on the expansive porches. Cabins provide
modest sleeping quarters with 8-10 beds per room each with their own storage
shelf. The bathrooms are everything you
could ask for in a campsite: running water, hot water, electrical outlets,
mirrors. The ranch has more amenities
than the vast majority of homes in the region.
It has only been a recent development that power came into the area.
Beyond the volunteer quarters are the on-site medical
clinic, the cattle ranching operation, the pig farming, the dairy barn, and the
resident quarters for those of the 65 staff members who needed to stay on site.
The clinic served 17 patients the day I visited. It was a slow day according to the
nurses. I was told that Wednesdays are
busier as it is the day the pregnant women can come to the clinic to obtain
pre-natal vitamins, receive checkups, and learn about ways to maintain a
healthy pregnancy. Since HOI has been in
the valley the mortality rate has decreased tremendously (I didn’t write down
the stats, but I recall them being tremendous).
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| Clinic Pharmacy |
On that day I was able to witness Tony, the surgeon
volunteer with the Wilderness Group, as he removed 6 cysts from a man’s
arm. Cindy was the primary
translator. While my level of
contribution to the medical process was miniscule, I felt useful speaking to
the patient and trying to lighten the mood.
There are no options for surgery to remove tumors, sharp objects, or to
remove extra hand digits unless a person is extremely wealthy and can afford
going to a big hospital, or if there is a volunteer surgeon in from the States.
This patient and the child who had extra thumbs cut off were both extremely fortunate
to come to the clinic when Tony volunteered his week at the ranch.
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| Dr. Tony removing tumors |
Ranch workers (including the doctor and the ranch hands)
live in cabins onsite. There are a few
ranch dogs that look healthier than any other dogs in the area and seem to
enjoy their lives on the ranch. One of
the nurses has a couple month old puppy named “poe-pee”. I couldn’t help but giggle.
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| Staff Quarters |
Medical, educational, and veterinary supplies are all stored
at the ranch. Everyone brought
donations. I brought two massive
suitcases stuffed with donations from several wonderful people at AutoTrader
and fabrics galore from my best friend Donna.
Kathy at work donated several no-sew blankets which Clark, Susan and I
were able to help make with several of the ladies in the vocational sewing
class. When Susan told the ladies they
could keep the blankets they made with the extras going to the clinic, the
ladies were extremely moved.
The amount of medical donations was tremendous. Our group
was told that our medical donations stock the clinic for 6 months! Without donations such as these, Tony would
not have been able to provide anything to numb the patient’s pain during the
cyst removals or pain medication to keep the post-operative pain at bay.
We were all wow-ed by the amount of useful donations.
A Job or Two
37 Wilderness team members could take on any of the
following jobs:
- Paint elementary school inside and out
- Art projects at elementary school
- Bird feeder fundraiser project at middle school
- Latrine digging and concrete mixing and pouring in Las Delicious
- Medical work at the clinic
- Vocational training assistance
- Documentary work (really just the two reporters who came for this purpose)
- Join the veterinary team
Some volunteers stuck with the same jobs each day, refusing
to give up until their job was complete.
Others, like me, wanted a more complete picture of the operations and
jumped around. The only job where I didn’t
assist or experience firsthand the results of the efforts was that of the
latrine digging and concrete mixing crew.
One of my favorite days was spend with the veterinary crew
where I was able to head out past San Esteban (a quaint little village that
doubles as a drop and exchange point for drugs, primarily cocaine) to El
Caulote. The experience was a dream come
true as I have truly dreamed about assisting animals in poverty stricken areas
that otherwise could not receive such help.
I was granted the opportunity to shadow several amazing veterinarians,
vet students, and a phenomenal vet tech during several dog spays and neuters,
cattle vaccinations, and a horse castration.
Administering de-worming medicine to tiny puppies made me feel warm and
giddy on the inside.
Especially neat, I learned about monitoring a dog’s vital
signs during a surgery, the steps involved in ensuring each animal patient’s
safety during these open air procedures, and the importance of being
educated. In this instance I’m speaking
specifically about education on proper animal medical care. Having some language skills on hand I chatted
with several owners about caring for their pets. I spoke with one group in particular about
the diseases and parasites carried by fleas and ticks and the importance of
removing these pests from their pets. Most
owners were extremely receptive and asked questions regarding food,
cleanliness, and training. I wish I had
training pamphlets and basic care guides in Spanish that I could have provided
as a take-home tool.
Aside from a day with the vets, my mornings were spent at
the HOI funded elementary school where I was able to act as a translator and to work with every
child grade 1-6 on two art projects. The
first project required students to place a thumb in the paint color of their
choice, then to place their thumbprints in the white area of a canvas with pre-painted
outlines of fish, butterflies, or other creatures. The students then placed their thumbprint on
a piece of paper next to their name.
Once the project is completed, a photo is taken of the final product and
the final name sheet.
From those photos,
greeting cards are made and sold as a fundraiser for the school. The children were very excited to learn that
they were helping the school raise money.
As you the reader may or may not be aware, school is quite expensive in
many countries and many children never have the opportunity to attend school
due to their finances (or lack thereof).
A group working at the middle school made bird feeders to
sell as a fundraiser. A volunteer
working with this group shared one child’s comment: (paraphrasing) “Why would anyone want to buy a bird feeder?
Don’t birds always have food?” This
comment comes from a child who at times may go a day or two without food in a
poor village. This particular volunteer
decided to change the name of the items to “bird baths”. After all, the units were bowl shaped and could
serve multiple purposes. When a group of
children is poor enough to consider feeding birds an absurd concept, should those
of us who consider bird feeders a minor $5 investment not feel compelled to
assist?
Thinking about these children and thinking back to the
children in the schools in Guatemala and Zimbabwe, I realized I cannot feasibly
bring all, many, or possibly any of these children back to the states to give
them and American education; however, the goal is not to make them
become like us in our world, rather, it is to help them become
more equipped for success in their world. What I CAN do to help them is to SHOW them
what it means to love unconditionally. I
can DEMONSTRATE is what it means to love an unknown neighbor. How I can LOVE them is to LEARN them
and to encourage them to dream. Dreams can become reality even in poverty stricken
land.
Hand-in-hand,
heart-to-heart, voice-to-voice our greatest job at the ranch was to lift each
other up. We can work across cultures,
professions, and generational gaps to enlighten, uplift, and inspire.
We will find we do just that when we are fulfill
our responsibility to love and do so by filling another’s needs with LOVE,
KNOWLEDGE, or MATERIALS.
Love in Action:
the Basic Ways to Give
People talk about Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. People also refer to the “three basic needs
of life” as: Food, water, shelter.
Within each category one can breakdown options into Good, Better,
Best. Food as a good source of protein
and energy. Food as a Better source of
protein, Energy, and Vitamins. Food as
the best source of protein, energy, vitamins, antioxidants…
This same logic can be applied to all three basic needs of
survival. The key word here is SURVIVAL, meaning simply TO REMAIN ALIVE.
Call me crazy, but I don’t want to simply remain alive. I want to THRIVE! I want to take in
the greatest amount of life’s teachings and experiences available and to do so
with great vigor and appreciation.
A reoccurring thought after visiting many poverty stricken rural
areas (Chile, Mexico, Dominican Republic, Puerto Rico, Guatemala, Honduras,
Zimbabwe, Zambia and even parts of the US) is the following:
We, as human beings, should take upon ourselves the responsibility to empower each other to not merely live, but rather to THRIVE.
Lizzy's three basic areas of THRIVE:
1. Love
It is of particular interest to me that in Matthew in the Christian
bible Jesus answers to the question “which is the greatest commandment…” with the following:
Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.Removing anyone’s individual beliefs regarding a deity or the lack thereof, it is beautiful to read that the basic and greatest commandments as spoken from the mouth of the Christian supreme being center on love.
In a recent reading I came
across a line from a man named John A Widtsoe:
Love is not a mere word or sensation within. To be a worthy love it must be brought into action.
This realization of love
must require a sincere sacrifice from oneself.
Feeling loved is
equivalent to a flower receiving sunshine.
Just like a flower with sun, we as humans perk up when we feel the light
of love in our lives.
How can we love our
neighbors if we do not know them?
- First step: Introduce yourself. It’s the hardest and simplest step.
- What if you have know of a person for 5 years and have never exchanged more than a wave?
- Recommendation: Find something you can do that might facilitate an introduction.
- If the mailman delivers your neighbor’s letter by accident to your address, hand deliver it to your neighbor’s door instead of placing it in the correct mailbox.
- Introduce your new pet to the neighbor, “just in case the new pet gets out”
- Bake extra cookies, rice crispy treats, or create simple rocky road fudge. Take an extra plate to a neighbor. Really, they would be doing you a “real favor” by taking the extras from your new recipe.
- Compliment or encourage a stranger.
The most memorable loving experience from a stranger was one where a traveler in the airport wrote a simple note and slipped it under my magazine as my head and tears were down on a rough day. The note did not identify the author, rather simply complimented me as a beautiful woman and encouraged me to keep smiling.
Are any of us ABOVE the act of providing a compliment or a word of encouragement to a stranger?Love with Arts and Crafts
While in Honduras at Rancho
Paraiso’s HOI elementary school I worked side-by-side with Cathy and Karia on
art projects with many children spanning first through 6th grade.
Each child received individual praise for his or her project. Bueno trabajo. Que lindo. Magnifico. Que
bonita. These phrases expressed love and
instilled confidence in so many young minds.
We encouraged them to keep their creativity sharp.
When we reached the 5th
grade classroom we decided to take the craft sticks and to write “Te amos mucho”
or “We love you a lot”. We put these
sticks up in the classrooms. Two 5th
grade girls in return created sticks for us with the words “We love you too!”
The first grade class gave us
homemade bracelets as a gift for our time with them.
By the time we worked on projects
with the 6th graders I began to write sweet notes on the back of the
projects already completed by the sole table of boys. “I love your eyes”. “Your smile warms my heart”. “Never stop smiling.” This spread.
Soon all of the girls wanted notes on the back of their projects from
me, Karia, Cathy, and the wonderful Kathy who had been arduously painting the
school outside.
I translated the English phrases
into Spanish for the girls who blushed, giggled. The boys punched each other in the arm if
their notes made them blush.
Just before I left, the boys
grabbed my attention to show me the edits to their work. Each of wrote expressions of their love for
me on their frames. I kissed them all on
the cheeks as they pretended to argue about which would be my boyfriend one
day.
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When you show love, you will receive love.
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Leaving the school I knew I had given much love and, once
again, received 10 fold the love I had shared.
The veterinary group empowered pet owners to be better companions for their animals.
